remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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