Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
My pussy is not your playground.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize