Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
At least make sure they are 18
Why
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
