I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
