Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
