Buhtt sex?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
