But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Randomize
