how can u be prego again
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
