I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize