I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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