Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
My feet surprised me
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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