He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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