No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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