If i come over, it means nothing
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
