Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
