So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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