Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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