On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
