I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
