I'm gonna have a badass scar
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize