And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
