just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I haven't been this sober since birth.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
All I want is dick and wine.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
