Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize