This girl is more easily done than said...
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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