i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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