everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
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