pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Randomize
