"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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