i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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