tell your sister to shave her snatch
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
