I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
