there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize