Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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