butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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