my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
The Olympian is in my bed
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
