How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
