ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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