Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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