i just wanna soil my oats bro
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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