Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Randomize
