idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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