My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
