I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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