i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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