New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
