I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
