it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
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