bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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