come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize