trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
