He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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