She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
